The Guard Dog

The Guard Dog

101 Guide on being a Katrina


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Step One: Dress like you rolled out of a Thrift Store trash can from 1997.

That’s oddly specific, but it’s accurate(Ex: Giant flannel that doesn’t fit you, ratty converse, rolled up jeans that are also too big for you, and a shirt that doesn’t matter because it’s mostly covered by your flannel.)

Step Two: Have REALLY puffy hair.

Katrina’s hair is very puffy and curly, but somewhat maintainable. By SOMEWHAT I mean like put a lot of effort and maintenance into your hair.

Step Three: Be an Equalist.

You must not be homophobic, racist, sexist, religionist, etc. To show this, make a ga-plane(gay plane, make sure it’s colorful).

Now an interview:

Q: Where do you buy your clothes?

A: At H&M, Crossroads(Thrift Store), and stolen from various family member, like my flannel, socks, etc.

Q: Who’s your weirdest friend?

A: My friend Julia, she’s a weirdo.

Q: Who’s the nicest to you?

A: My friend Lana. She’s a very hospitable person and is kind to almost everyone.

Q: What’s been your best experience?

A: Concerts are probably when I’m happiest. Especially with friends. Meeting people I admire. Once I met Miles Mckenna, who’s a LGBTQ+ youtuber. He’s pretty neat.

Q: What’s been your weirdest experience?  

A: I was at the meltdown, which a comic book shop in LA, I was going to see a comedy show there and I bumped into Kate Flannery (who plays Meredith on the Office). I apologized, not realizing who I had just bumped into, and then started freaking out after my family told me who I’d just bumped into.

Q: What is your religion? Do you like it?

A: I don’t have one, but the meme cult sounds intriguing.

Q:  What’s your favorite book? Do you recommend it?

A: My favorite book is the Giver and I recommend it along with the whole series.

Q: Favorite Quote?

A: I don’t have one.

Q: What’s your favorite song?

A: It is Miserable America by Kevin Abstract or Palace/Curse by The Internet

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101 Guide on being a Katrina